Last weekend was my ten year high school reunion. I had to miss it because I live in Mexico. The invitation and subsequent correspondence with former classmates has me waxing nostalgic. The town I grew up in was pretty idyllic, though none of us would have ever admitted as much at the time. We were typical, unhappy, safe and contented in our discontent.

I have gone ahead and devised a test based on my experience growing up in Clinton, Ct. Don't worry if you miss of few of the answers. The sports department head/de facto history teacher, Mr. Brigockas is grading these exams and he is almost always too tipsy to notice. Bonne Chance!

1. What was the name of my middle school clique?
A. The Prude Patrol
B. The Posse
C. The Pink Flamingos
D. Six Chicks

2. Within this clique my position in the social hierarchy was:
A. Alpha Girl
B. BFF to Alpha Girl
C. The girl whose mom let us drink a little
D. The smart, funny pariah within the group

3. What was the name of the arcade/ice cream shoppe on the Madison border, across from The Clam Castle?
A. Uncle Toad's
B. Chip's
C. Pip's
D. Mario's Prize Palace

4. The Clam Castle was:
A. Great!
B. Gross!

5. What was the name of my 6th grade class play?
A. How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying
B. Snowy White and the Seven Chicks
C. Eight is Enough, adapted for the stage by Neil Simon
D. Hamlet

6. My high school was The Morgan School. What was the team name of our biggest rival?
A. The Daniel Hand Band of Heroes
B. The Guilford Buccaneers
C. The Valley Regional Minutemen
D. Nobody cared, because we were pretty awful at sports. Except for girls' volleyball. Those girls would hurt you.

7. In my high school it was more highly valued to be:
A. Sort of stoned
B. Clever-smart, book-smart, stoned-smart
C. Preparing to go on Dead tour/in an indie rock band
D. All of the above

8. My friends and I abandoned the National Honors Society Blood Drive that we were working in order to:
A. Collect more people to donate blood for a good cause
B. Escape the reign of terror of Rebecca Harris and her army of pedantic bores
C. Drive around in Tadd's old BMW, get stoned, go to Marty's and eat 72 chicken fingers with all the dipping sauces.
D. Both B and C

9. Tom Smith, a truly hilarious person once wrote a satire:
A. based on The Aeneid and entitled the Daneid dedicated to Michael Franco whom Tom had nicknamed Danny Tanner from the family friendly sitcom Full House
B. It's A
C. I have just given you the answer to two questions.
D. Poor Michael Franco only vaguely resembled Bob Saget

10. What was written over the doorway of my freshman year English class?
A. Cead Mile Failte
B. Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid
C. Abandon all hope ye who enter here
D. Don't you draw the queen of diamonds boy, she'll beat you if she's able

Extra Credit: I graduated from high school in what year?
A. 1996
B. I didn't. Senior year I got knocked up, dropped out, and years later finally got my GED
C. Trick question: Clinton still uses the Julian Calendar. So it was 1987 in our estimation.
D. My class pulled such an outrageous, illegal prank that we were all suspended and couldn't graduate until the following spring. We all had to defer college. seriously.

In conclusion, although Wonderful Tonight was a totally trite choice for prom song, class of '06, you were all alright. Except for Seth Greenlaw.

Write in with your answers! High score gets free entry into this year's Bluefish Festival.