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HURRY UP PLEASE IT’S TIME

After 9 months and 12 days in utero I decided to bail on the whole womb situation and make my glorious entrance into the world. After 17 years in Clinton, I finally escaped the horrible oppression of the Connecticut shoreline. After two years at college in Boston I slouched back home. After 4 years in New York I had had enough of the excess of everything – the bodies, the noise, and the cost of it. After 2 years of rest in college town extraordinaire I was ready to fly far, far away for the first time and mean it. I have lived in Mexico for approximately 2 years, 6 months and 1 day. I am ready to be going now.

There are always signs that it’s time. Whether it’s contractions, graduation, depression, unemployment, or complacency there’s no mistaking being given a push. Momentum is a bit of a riddle and intertia can sneak up when you least expect it. In The City options are overwhelming and we essentially became charming agoraphobics. In New Haven the Volvo was a target for vandals and then slipped time and never really ran again. I was out of ideas for careers and Malcolm was suffocating in the attic. We already had the plan to do this and our increasingly unhappy experience felt like a confirmation or form of encouragement.

When we finally take our leave of this country there will be an accounting. Did I have as much fun as I could? Did I learn everything I should? Did I reach out and connect? Was I a good person? Was the effort worth it in the end? Am I changed for the better by this experience? It’s the evaluation of every life’s stage and ultimately, if you have the time and inclination, a sort of a death bed scenario. In my Saint Peter/Pearly Gates flashback episode I even envision a little comment card and a tiny pencil to fill in the excellent, average, poor, very poor bubbles. When you examine your life as it is lived you totally get your money’s worth, as with Chili’s breakfast.*

Nothing horrible is currently happening, and we are not handling Mexican life poorly, or any more poorly than we have been already. Some things are great and some are presenting a bit of a hassle, but such is life everywhere. We are here for the present and plan to be here for months of every year in our future. I am already curious to know what kind of pull this place will have once I am not living here full-time. I know that I have grown up here, gained confidence here, opened my mind and heart to the beauty of otherness; much like Boston University and Deb’s Uterus this has been an opportunity for change and maturation. But I’m ready to know what happens next.

*Haz click

There Are 5 Responses So Far. »

  1. Color me curious as to where the next stop will be…

  2. Oh if only I could be so eloquent in stating that it’s time to get the fuck out of Mexico.

    When hubby’s US Visa is approved we will be gone, gone, gone from here. And perhaps then pulled back by as yet unnoticed strings…but so what…I can’t wait to MISS living in Mexico.

  3. Interesting. My husband is feeling the pull to leave as well. I will always have a bit of my heart here, but it is a big world and I would like my kids to live in as much of it as possible. Will be go back to the US? Maybe, but only to somewhere cool like New Orleans. Panama? Maybe. What about you guys?

  4. Interesting post, thanks.

    I’m deciding where to go next in life myself and the Yucatan is one of my options — and was my second choice when I last changed location a year ago.

    I chose a nice college town in the Blue Ridge Mountains instead, but may be dusting off those Yucatan plans — getting restless once more.

    At any rate, your all’s blog has allowed me to live vicariously there for this past year, a parallel universe I’d be living in if I’d gone down Mexico Way a year ago. Thanks for all the entertaining writing and photos!

    Matt in Virginia

  5. Jillian,

    I’ve been a lurker on your site for a couple of years now. I appreciate very much how you and Malcolm share your perspectives on your adventure. I’m interested that you are now thinking of leaving Mexico and will look forward to your reflections on that time.

    Thanks for being willing to share your thoughts with us.

    Neil in Olympia, Washington

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